It shows a contradiction of a desire to die because of self-imposed shame and a desire to saved from death through God's grace. The overwhelming sense is one of desperation and self-defeat.The illustation of this begins in sonnet one, line 3, with a spoke desire to die.
I run to death, and death meets me as fast,
In sonnet 9, man's justification of his actions and his his struggle with God is shown.
If poisonous minerals, and if that tree,
Whose fruit threw death on (else immortal) us,
If lecherous goats, if serpents envious
Cannot be damn'd, alas ! why should I be ?
Why should intent or reason, born in me,
Make sins, else equal, in me more heinous ?
And, mercy being easy, and glorious
To God, in His stern wrath why threatens He ?
It is an exemplary example of the struggle with religion and deity as a whole, that many encounter at some point in their life. As you read on though the sonnet and into the following sonnets, you see how he has returned to his beliefs and continues to ask for his savior to rescue him from himself, even confronting death himself.
Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so ;
For those, whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy picture[s] be,
Much pleasure, then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou'rt slave to Fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well,
And better than thy stroke ; why swell'st thou then ?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And Death shall be no more ; Death, thou shalt die.
Sonnet 14 then illustrates his reverence for God and his belief that God can overcome all obstacles and is truly the supreme and omnipotent being of his faith.
Batter my heart, three-person'd God ; for you
As yet but knock ; breathe, shine, and seek to mend ;
That I may rise, and stand, o'erthrow me, and bend
Your force, to break, blow, burn, and make me new.
The last of the sonnets, number 19, is a concise picture of the thoughts and feelings of most religious people that I have encountered. It shows that faith requires an daily submission to and renewal of their beliefs. It is an active process.
Oh, to vex me, contraries meet in one:
Inconstancy unnaturally hath begot
A constant habit; that when I would not
I change in vows, and in devotion.
As humorous is my contrition
As my profane love, and as soon forgot:
As riddlingly distempered, cold and hot,
As praying, as mute; as infinite, as none.
I durst not view heaven yesterday; and today
In prayers and flattering speeches I court God:
Tomorrow I quake with true fear of his rod.
So my devout fits come and go away
Like a fantastic ague; save that here
Those are my best days, when I shake with fear.
Whether a religious person or not, his ability to convey such commitment and conviction is to be admired.
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